In actual fact, I seriously feel very lethargic nowadays. If my boy don't exist I probably won't get out of bed. He's like the alarm clock without a snooze button. He's the reason I drag myself out of bed and to the office because he's child care is near my office and because hubs make me drive him to school, I drive more carefully on the road with him in the car.
Today, my colleague remarked that I'm starting to be antisocial. He mentioned that previously I'm usually the first one out of my cubicle at lunch time and all so eager to suggest lunch venues but now I just hide in my cubicle and turn down lunch invites. He highlighted this have been on-going since last Dec? Gosh haven't notice that, have I really become antisocial ?
On certain days, I feel charged up with adrenalin, I will be ultra efficient and simply smile at everyone and have conversation with my neighbouring colleagues but on days like this I wish I can go hide underneath a blanket. Everything seems to hurt. I'm not sure if i am imagining all this pain. Maybe my system is crashing. Is there a boot disk for MK 1.0?
I don't think I mange stress well. When I was 20, I ingested 16 paracetamol at a go cause I was stressed of my life choice. Seriously dumb move and because my friend called my house, my parents really bang my door ever so loudly and gave me hell but overdose didn't kill me. Haha so I learned.
Am I really ok? I'm seriously starting to doubt myself. One of the guys asked what I had for lunch today. I honestly can't recall but I did left the office for a walk. The office area is seriously depressing, Mt E @ Novena adjacent to the office, TTSH just across the road, Renci diagonally opposite that sometimes I feel worse taking a walk here. I miss working in Outram cause I love the vicinity to Keppel Bay Marina where I love the serene view of the docking yacht.
I need to be at the top of my game. Now... How do I pull myself out of this shipwreck.
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